Slay your complacency! You’d better know how or it can become the killer of your dreams, finances, relationships, and even the future YOU. (or the 4 F’s as I like to call them)
Sure, we can say that complacency is dangerous, but most don’t really think it’s all that serious. Perhaps there’s some confusion as to what complacency really is, so let’s start there.
1: self-satisfaction especially when accompanied by unawareness of actual dangers or deficiencies 2: an instance of usually unaware or uninformed self-satisfactionMerriam Webster
In other words, self-satisfaction is more important than improvements. Think about it, when was the last time staying in your comfort zone for too long actually helped you? Growth requires some discomfort. And most of us would agree that what grows us, aka, improves us, takes various levels of discomfort. Frankly, we’re not all that comfortable with that!
Slayed by circumstances?
We like to say that we were blindsided by certain situations, turn of events, or circumstances, but is the truth closer to just being more focused on our own self-satisfaction? Specifically, I’m talking about the things that are within your control. Goal-setting and getting, plans and strategies, thoughts, relationships, etc.
Many of us are putting too much pressure on ourselves to achieve our ideal of “success”. Much of that success metric comes from comparing ourselves and our journey against others. How’s that working out for ya?
The truth is that you cannot control what happens TO you, but you can control your choices. It’s good to remember that your life is happening for you more than it happens to you. There’s a fun little word I learned last year, aphorme, that really helped solidify that mindset. Read this blog about perspective if you want to know more about that trip.
Better choices make better outcomes.
How to slay your complacency
First and foremost you need to identify the area(s) where you are being most complacent. Trust me, you’ll have different areas needing more attention than others at different times. Just know this, you can’t do better, have better, or be better if you are unwilling to slay your places of comfort and stagnation.
Identify your go-to hideouts. There are two spots that are constant culprits in my life, and they’re usually some form of comparison or obsessive pursuit of success. So I will use these two areas as examples. You’ve got to know how to slay them before they get out of control and wreak havoc on your life!
So how does one kill comparison? Consistency. Specifically, consistent self-improvement. I’m talking about raising your own standards for you. Make excellence the minimum standard for yourself. You see, “success” compares you against others, while excellence compares you against YOU. See the difference?
Plus, you can get excited for YOU. See results quickly because you are in control of how much you are learning, practicing, and doing! What others are doing has no bearing on how you were better than you yesterday! So quit the comparison.
No one can consistently act in a manner inconsistent with the way she sees herself.– unknown
Learning to do the work in order to get out of the complacency of “never enough” is often a matter of getting ourselves out to the comparison trap! (and recognizing how to avoid the traps in the first place)
How you see yourself is how you will present yourself. If you’re not seeing yourself beyond your roles, titles, labels, or history, you’ll continue to chase someone else’s ideal instead of living like you were God’s greatest idea. If you’re ready to embrace your true identity and live like you were loved and chosen, give this a read, and then see if you show up in your life a bit differently. 😉
Identifying your secret success code
Comparison is one hideout and definitely trips us up. Especially when we neglect to embrace our true identity over the ones we strive for.
Another area that we can get complacent about is our “success”. Specifically how we define it. Is your pursuit of achievement really a secret code for something else?
Oh, I don’t know, maybe your obsession to succeed is driven by your fear of failure, rejection, or being ignored or looked over. Chasing success feeds your need to be seen as relevant/important in order to feel relevant/important. Girl, feelings follow choice!
Chasing success goes right back to the identity thing, ’cause we act what we believe. And you either believe you are those roles, titles, labels, or history, or that you are who God says you are. The one that you believe is the YOU that’s going to show up. VAL (Valued, Amazing Lady), your worth comes from within, not from external achievements or accolades. You matter and are important because He said so. Period.
Keeping you in prayer to learn what truly equips you to slay your complacency and the wisdom to use it!
working on slaying my complacency right there with ya,