Butt in or Back off?

To butt in or to back off, that is this week’s question I’ve been mulling over and over in my mind.

I guess you could say this is a continuation of the last post I wrote, about the four letter words and adult language our kids should be learning. (you can read it HERE)

The back to school season always brings it’s fair share of adjustments, arrangements as well as information, expectations and policies for both students and parents. Sports, extracurricular activities, their fees and schedules are included too! 

All to be expected, right?

What I’m finding interesting is the struggle parents and teachers are having with student’s work load.

These days we have full access to our student’s schedules and their teachers. The teachers are doing a great job to be sure we are in the know via virtual portals, apps, emails, google classroom…to name a few. 

I see parents quick to butt in and advocate that there’s too much expected of their child academically. (Parents can’t possibly back off extracurricular schedules during the school year – where would the scholarship possibly come? How can she expect to get the lead if she can’t dance 4 hours a night?)

I’ve seen teacher’s back off the workload in order to accommodate “junior/ette’s” busy after school life. (apparently it’s no reason to butt into someone’s potential “future career” just because it’s academic season )

It’s only September people…

So which is the proper balance? (ugh! that word – read this to understand my sentiment)

When is the proper time to butt in or back off?

Oh, and make no mistake your kid knows exactly which one they want you to do! That’s the slippery slope folks.

I’m just curious to know when school was no longer a student’s full time “job” and extracurricular activities became such an “end all be all” to their school careers. Yes, I get that colleges look at well rounded students. Academics, sports and arts are all part of a “whole student”, but who decides the weight and the cost? And by cost, I mean both figuratively and literally.

I see so much pressure and emphasis to be the best student, athlete, community volunteer and leader. (all at once mind you) How does this affect their expectations outside of the school bubble?

All I can say, kuddos to the teachers out there who are trying their very best to properly equip students through education! You’ve got a lot to compete against for that student’s attention.

Trying to find the right butt in or back off formula right there with you,


I’d love to hear your thoughts on this – comment below!

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